It’s Early, but I’m Already Late

March 30, 2011 by

Three days into my new schedule, and I’m already late with a blog post. Hmmm….makes me wonder if this is going to be a losing battle.

Even though my writer genes often make me jump to the worst case scenario, I don’t want to focus on the negative. Yes, it’s hard and I’m pushing forward on little-to-no sleep, but I knew this first week would be.

I spent about an hour working on my edits for Harry, and that’s all the time I’ve been able to log in a week. But I have accomplished so much more.

Lets just look at today.

The alarm went off at 4:00 am because I had a 5:00 am appointment with my trainer. One of my top priorities with this transition is to stick with my fitness plan. Since transitioning began the end of last week, I only missed one intended workout session and physical and mental exhaustion was the cause. Something to feel positive about

I hit the gym, came home and hit the showers, dressed (with hair and makeup done) and was in the office by 7:00 am. Our warehouse and office are just that. We don’t have a showroom and it’s rare I physically greet customers, but I decided to adopt a philosophy I heard at a writer’s conference once (and I’m sorry, but I don’t remember the source.) “Just because we can work in our PJs, doesn’t mean we always should.” Taking the time to put myself together, even if I’ll be alone for most of the day, makes me feel better. Feeling better is the first step to pushing through hard times.

I had a clean to-do list by noon. (Self-explanatory)

Beat the afternoon rush, hit the grocery store, made it home, and have now put up the late blog post.

Am I getting it all done? No. But as a commenter pointed out Monday, Wonder Woman is mythical. I’m accomplishing enough to be happy with myself…and being late isn’t the worst crime in the book…

Looking at the positives, isn’t the easiest thing for me to do, but taking the time to be realistic in my self-evaluation is more productive than fretting over what I didn’t get done. Celebrate baby steps!

Are you a glass half full or a ‘I cut my lip on the broken glass’ kinda person?

Filed Under: Life, Road to Fitness, Writing Life Tagged With: , ,

The Ever Changing Face of Time Management

March 28, 2011 by

The thing about the best laid plans, is that life has a way of throwing some lemons into your beef stew and making an inedible mess.

Beginning today, I return to a full time job outside the house. I’ve blogged before about time management, but this is going to be a game-changing wrench into my normal day-to-day. Yes, I know I’m not the only aspiring writer–or just plain writer–who has to work a day job, but I’d be lying if I wasn’t a little worried about time management.

This isn’t going to be about squeezing out an hour or even thirty minutes. I need to squeeze an extra forty hours out of my schedule.

I already have some ideas on how to manage my time to get it all plus done, but today I’m looking for pointers from you. Use the comment section below to share some of your time management ideas, and in two weeks I’ll post un update on how it’s going and how effective your suggestions were.

 

Filed Under: Life, Uncategorized, Writing Life Tagged With: , , , ,

The Topics of the Day

March 23, 2011 by

Today, you can find out a little more about me by heading over to my friend, Jill Kemerer’s blog: Jill Kemerer, Author.

Favorite drinks, food, and dream vacations are the topic of the day. If you want to know the answer’s you’ll have to follow the link.

Thanks, Jill, for asking me your 5 easy questions.

Filed Under: Life, MVRWA Tagged With: , ,

Maumee Valley RWA’s Annual Book Lover’s Event

March 22, 2011 by

Maumee Valley Romance Writers
Presents our
Spring Book Lover’s Event.

Location: Toledo Public Library, Sanger Branch

3030 West Central Ave.
Toledo, OH 43606

Experience the different types of romances available as local authors give readings from their newest releases.

Scheduled to be present: Tori Carrington, Elizabeth Vaughan, Shay Lacy, Tracy Madison, Deanna Wadsworth, Rue Allyn, Wendy Burke

Learn about a career in Romance Writing from those who are doing it.

Bring a friend and enjoy snacks and laughter with fellow book lovers.

Free Books! 3 large Raffle prizes (Free to enter)!

Filed Under: Books, MVRWA, Writing Life Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , ,

Hope Springs Eternal

March 21, 2011 by

I spent Saturday at Pokagon State Park, near Angola Indiana on Saturday. Though the morning started out on the chilly side, by early afternoon it had grown into a beautiful day.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t unable to enjoy the weather, because we were there for the Untied States Pony Club’s Great Lakes Region Quiz Rally. My daughter was competing with her club-mates and the son and I were volunteering. While it was a wonderful day, the moments I was able to walk outside between the two buildings or look out the large windows at the beautiful lake, the woods, and well-kept grounds proved one of the coldest, snowiest winters in a long time was finally (fingers crossed!) over.

There’s something about Spring that reminds me starting over is possible. Just as my tulips and crocus are beginning to push through the dirt in the flower boxes, we can wake up after some down time and spend some time in the sun.

I feel like I’m coming out of hibernation of sorts. Last week I finished up the rough draft on my new project and will be starting the second draft next week. Though revising and rewriting is usually not my favorite part of this job, I’m looking forward to it on this project. The first draft was sketchy for me, and I know I’ll find semblance this time through. I also feel in my gut that with polish this will be turn into a great story.

 

Filed Under: Life, Writing Life Tagged With: , , , , ,

Something To Dance To

March 18, 2011 by

It’s been one of those weeks. You know the kind, where stress rains down on you and you just can’t seem to get caught up no matter what you do.

As I’ve often mentioned here I find solace in music. And I sought out this song to cut loose with while I was driving the other day.

Something’s working me over / The groove is in my blood … What I want is to take my worries out on the floor tonight / I had a day that went so wrong, now I want to make it right.

Yeah, that crazy woman in the car next to you at the stop light banging on her steering wheel? That was me.

On Wednesday, some good news came my way via facebook. This artist, Eric Himan, has released the first single off his new album.

Check it Dust at Bandcamp

Filed Under: Life, Music Tagged With: , , , ,

Getting the Upper Hand Over Fear

March 16, 2011 by

Today, I’m going to finish up my little mini-series on fear with what is probably the hardest part: dealing with our fears.

I wish I could tell you there was an easy road out, maybe a little pill you could take that would ease the self-doubt and anxiety, but the truth is we have to rely on our inner strength and logic to avoid becoming like that little guy pictured to the left. Letting our fear paralyze us, not only adds unwanted stress, but it keeps us stagnant and unable to move forward.

Let’s look at each of the fears I outlined on Monday and talk about ways to get past each one.

The Comfort Zone

For a lot of people, stepping outside of the boxes we create for ourselves is hard work. We like our favorite haunts and our routines. This is further emphasized by a little fact I heard a while back. The average person responsible for fixing meals for the home, relies on the same ten meals. For the most part, humans love their routines. So, how can we convince ourselves that it’s okay to break out of the comfort zone?

This is where we look to self-talk and logic.  First, examine your strengths. Are you properly prepared for the job you seek or the goal in life you’re trying to accomplish. Sit down and write out all your strengths and special abilities that make you suited for the task at hand. Now, fold up that piece of paper and slip it into your purse of wallet–or better yet, tape it to your refrigerator. When the fears begin to rise up you can look at your list and remind yourself that where your headed can and will become your new comfort zone.

The Unknown

Remember this ugly relative to fear number one? He’s a little different, though. This fear is about not knowing what to expect when you reach the end of your journey. Again, the remedy is knowledge. With most people being connected to the internet, finding the answers to the unknown isn’t that hard of a task. With a little creative searching, you can get pages and pages on any topic. Do several searches on every aspect of ‘your goal’ and make your self familiar with how life might change when you achieve your goals. If you know someone who is already living your dream, talk to them. Get the facts. Make the unknown the known.

It will Change Me

Success will inflate my ego or make me a different person, is the myth that is associated with this fear. While it’s true we all know someone who circumstances in life altered their personality, we need to realize and accept this is under our own control. Remember who we are and our core values, and this is just a silly stumbling block that we put in our own way. Success doesn’t change people, it’s how they handle it.

Look inside and have faith in yourself.  Then, take a deep breath and push the fears aside. Now the road to your goal is clear. Safe travels.

I’m not a doctor, or anything like it. The advice here is based on my own observations and experiences.

Filed Under: Life, Writing Life Tagged With: ,

Don’t Let Fear Get in Your Way

March 14, 2011 by

Henry Ford once said “Failure is the opportunity to begin again more intelligently.” And while that’s a great quote, and a great attitude to have if you’ve tried your hardest to achieve something, yet fell short of reaching that goal, it shouldn’t even be a thought while we’re making our attempts.

On Friday I previewed today’s and Wednesday’s post with the thought that one of the biggest obstacles we need to overcome is a fear of success, more precisely the fear of change. Today, I’d like to talk about some of the reasons behind that fear, and later in the week I’ll give some tips for easing the fears.

I’m not a doctor or a therapist of anything close to it. My discussion here is strictly about my experiences, or the experience of people close to me and how I deal with them, or the tools I’ve watched others use to overcome these obstacles.

  • The Comfort Zone – I’ll talked a little bit about this on Friday, but this is the reason I can most identify with. I’ve mentioned on these pages before that I’m a creature of habit. I think things in order, I like to follow a schedule. When my plans or normal day-to-day gets shaken up, it becomes almost as if I’ve physically been tripped. Succeeding – which for me means a publishing contract – would definitely be something that would push me out of my comfort zone.
  • The Unknown – This one could be considered a cousin to the comfort zone, because really, they do go hand-in-hand. What is outside your comfort zone, is an unknown, but this is more about truly not knowing what to expect when you achieve your goal: not understanding how life might change, and being afraid of your ability to handle the changes.
  • The Changes Caused in Me – You don’t have to look much further than the daily celebrity headlines to see examples of how a little success can blow a person’s ego up like a hot-air balloon. I’m sure all of us know someone on a more personal level – a family member, friend or coworker – who got a promotion at work or a new dream job, and the achievement went straight to their head. Or we know someone or know of someone who came into some money, and then acquired unappealing personality traits.  It’s enough to make you believe the old adage that money is the root of all evil, a parallel that to success is money’s evil twin brother.

On Wednesday I will give some suggestions on how we can address these fears head on and, hopefully, overcome them. In the meantime, is there a specific fear I haven’t listed here that sometimes gets in your way?

Filed Under: Life, Writing Life Tagged With: , ,

Recognizing and Respecting Fear

March 11, 2011 by

~~The key to change is to let go of fear ~~ Roseanne Cash

It’s been said that the one thing that most stands in the way of success is fear. You may be wondering why anyone would be afraid of succeeding, but I don’t think that’s the heart of the issue. It’s changing the status quo.

How many of can really say we’re comfortable stepping out of comfort zone? How many truly like going into uncharted territory and dealing with things we’ve never dealt with before?

Fear is a pretty universal emotion. I’m sure everyone reading this has a pretty good understanding of what it can do to you. I’m sure you’re asking yourself, “So, I’m just supposed to let go of fear?”

Well, no. It isn’t about that emotion alone. In order to be successful in whatever it is you want to achieve, you need to work hard and have the necessary skills. But, I also think you need to learn how to identify if you’re letting fear control your actions.

Letting go of our fears is hard, but I think the secret to not letting the emotion control or rule us is to learn to recognize when it’s plaguing us. Only then can we address the true concerns that are causing the fear.

Next week on Monday and Wednesday, I will be talking about common fears, how to recognize them and ways to deal with them.

Also, on Monday I will be blogging at the MVRWA Group Blog about How Stories Grow From the Smallest Seeds.

Filed Under: Life, Uncategorized, Writing Life Tagged With: , ,

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly: Giving Characters Balance

March 9, 2011 by

The first pieces of information that come to me when I begin a new story are most often the characters. I start thinking about this guy or this girl. The predicament they’re in or their goals and what’s standing in the way are secondary. It begins with the person: their heart, where they live, what they are like, etc; but when I was a beginning writer I made what I think is a common mistake.

I put my characters into boxes. He’s a good guy. She’s a nasty little vixen of a villain. Black and white with very little shades of gray. The end result was characters that didn’t really resemble anyone I really knew. It was hard to develop a real connection to them, even the all-good, because they felt fake. It took a lot of contemplation, some advice from critique partners and an old philosophical question to set me on the right path.

The question: Are humans inherently good or evil?

I’m not going to spend this space hashing out the arguments for both sides, but the discussions from my beginning philosophy and psychology classes in college came racing back to me. And then, I really started thinking about the real people in my life–every aspect of my life. Yes, I’ve encountered a few complete and total jerks that I feel have no redeeming qualities, but they are by no means the norm.  Most people are balanced.

Even the best people I know make mistakes from time to time. Heck, I’m the queen of making missteps, but I like to think of myself as having a kind heart. And then there are those who I may end up on the opposite side of an argument or have opposing goals.  If I really think about it, they aren’t all bad. In fact, they really aren’t bad at all. They just have an opinion that opposes my own.

Now, as I write and develop characters, I try to ground them in reality. My heroes and heroines have faults. My villains have redeeming qualities–or at the very least, grounded motives. (Though, oddly, I have to say I LOVE writing bad guys!)

Not only do my characters have balance, but I feel like it makes for a better story.

 

Filed Under: Writing Life Tagged With: , , ,
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